Getting Past the Prodding

Yesterday was my dreaded high risk screening at the Hillman Cancer Center in Pittsburgh, PA. My appointment was scheduled for 11am, so by 8am mom and I were out the door and on our way to the 'Burgh.

Being that it is January, we were getting hit with a bit of snow so our truck down 79S was a lil' more blustery than usual. After 2.5 hours and finally convincing my mother to put the cruise above 55mph, we had made it to the city. The GPS is bellowing in our face to TURN LEFT IN 300 FEET! My mother immediately whips the car left as I am yelling that we are not supposed to be turning for 300 more feet. We veer right. We pull into the exit of the Hillman Cancer Center because my mom seemed to have missed the entrance. The valet parking dude was trying to keep a straight face as we get out of the car.

11am on the dot rolls around and Carmen, the nurse, calls me back. Mom and I get up and head down the hallway, following Carmen. She directs us into this little room with a table, four chairs, computer and a ton of filing cabinets. At this point I am a nervous wreck because I am under the impression that very soon I will move rooms and undergo the ovarian sonogram which entails a probe. And as far as I knew I was also scheduled for a mammogram. Just as I begin to break into a cold sweat there is a knock at the door, in enters Darcy, the Genetic Counselor. Darcy introduces herself and begins detailing for us what it means to be high risk as well as how the BRCA (the cancer gene which runs in my family) can be passed from generation to generation. So far my mom, one of my mom's cousins, my grandma, both of my grandma's sisters, and my great grandma have tested positive for the BRCA gene. After about an hour with Darcy, mom and I spend an hour discussing with the Dr. Zorn (an Ovarian and Breast Cancer Oncologist) all of my options: do I want to be tested for the BRCA gene? Do I not want to know if I have the gene? If I do get tested, and I am positive, what will I have to do? But the best news of all is that I am too young to be probed or mammogrammed, even being high risk! WOOO!!! Apparently, I have to be 25 to undergo probing. AMEN.

I decide that I want to get the BRCA gene test done. I want to be as proactive as possible. All I have to do is give 8 viles of blood and the hospital will send them off to be tested in Utah, the exact place where my mom had her's examined. Because my mom's BRCA gene is located in her DNA at cell number 3248, that is where mine would also be located, should I too carry the gene. Wild stuff.

I get moved to another room and a very small lady comes in to draw my blood. Small lady and I begin to chat as she is tying a rubber band around my arm. When she goes to swab the butt-crack of my arm (inner-elbow) with rubbing alcohol I inform her that I used self-tanner and it may come off orange. It does. We begin to chat about tanning and how it is so terrible, which is why I love self-tanner so much. She agrees. Next thing you know, we are already 5 viles deep. However, this is where it begins to get interesting. I start to feel very strange. Small lady keeps asking me if I feel okay-- I lie and say "yes, small lady." Then on vile 6 I fall out of my chair and onto the floor. Small lady (somehow) pulls me up onto the table/bed in the room. I open my eyes, small lady is very concerned that I just passed out. I tell her not to worry. Once we finish collecting the rest of the viles of blood, I am determined to get the heck out the hospital. I tell her I am ready to go, she cautions me that I should wait a bit longer to leave. I don't listen.

I go out to the waiting room where I find my mother. Mom takes one look at me and says, "Danielle, are you okay?" I lie again. "Yes." Apparently at this point my skin was basically opaque and my lips were white. We venture to the elevator where I ask my mom if should would be so kind as to hold my purse. Within seconds my head falls back and I am on the floor of the elevator. Thankfully there was a nurse in the elevator with my mom and I. Nurse lady and mom drag me off the elevator and into a chair. I have no recollection of this. When I finally wake back up there is nurse lady standing on one side of me and mom on the other. These two are rubbing wet wash cloth on my face to which my response apparently was, "be careful not to mess up my self-tanner!"

Mom manages to get me into the car and we stop at Panera for lunch. I almost pass out in the bathroom but don't. After lunch I am finally feeling back to myself, which I think was a relief for mom because I really don't think she should have been trying to drag her 22 year old daughter around in her arms.

All goes well from there and we even did a little shopping on the way home.

In two weeks I will know if I do or do not carry the BRCA gene. If I do not I will go about my life like a regular person. Should I carry the gene then I will have to get probed (dang) and mammogrammed (double dang) once a year, every year until I am 35, which is when I would have a full hysterectomy. After 35 I will still have to have a yearly mammogram. Also, I would have to get my children tested for the gene because they too would be at risk for having it. Crazy stuff, but it is amazing what medicine can do these days.

I will be sure to let everyone know how my BRCA test comes back!