I Can't Use Technology and Others Woe Is Me Crapola

I have been terrible at keeping up with my blog the past few days...

Which now that I think about it, have snowballed into a two week draught of bloglessness. I hate excuses so I won't fill this entry with the millions of reasons I wasn't blogging. Because mostly, they are just that: excuses.

But that is neither here nor there because I have not completely forgotten my blog and I'm here now, writing away.

So, I got a new phone. If you know me personally, you know that I am probably suffering from Asperger's because I do NOT handle change very well. That paired with my inability to be substantially technologically coherent, I have spent a lot of time reading about "how to use an Android." Because yes, I upgraded from my old school, Zack-Morris-style, telly to a sleek and fully loaded "smart phone" which has more whistles and bells than I can handle.

My Android has "apps," which I must admit my Grandma (literally) told me about. Yes, my Grandma knows more about technology than I do. This phone pretty much does everything but wipe my rear end for me (and really, it should because let me tell you, technology doesn't come cheap).

One night last week, I was laying in my bed. I probably should have been doing homework or blogging or doing something productive but instead I decided familiarize myself with the Mecca of technology in my life-- my phone. Somewhere between realizing my phone is constantly tracking my longitude and latitude (which is totally creepy... tell me the government isn't running my life, without my knowing...) and that I am able to read any newspaper in the world at the touch of a button, I stumbled upon "Google Sky Map."

Not only can my phone tell me when Sidney Crosby farts (compliments of my Pittsburgh Penguins App) but it can track the constellations and then display them on my screen in relationship to where I am.

Wouldn't you know that the stars which form the "Cancer" constellation are directly above my pillow every night.

I am currently preparing to do the first part of my two part teaching field experience. I have been prepping myself to teach the literary elements to love-crazed, pimply faced, hormone induced teenagers. But what I was not prepared for was the literary element which found its way into my life while I was supposed to be doing anything but scanning the sky with my Sky Map App: irony.